last fire

i'm going to let this fire burn
one last time
it's going to sit in my hand, if only for a moment
it reminds me of all the life i could've led
all the dreams i've held
i think, for a second,
that things could've been different
but in the end, i am my own vice
i still crave that solitude
that aloneness
it's a bittersweet justification
to be alone
but to wish to be with others
and to have the opportunity, but ultimately,
this is me, alone
watching the fire burn into the night